How Much of A Role Model is Our Media?

How Much of A Role Model is our Media?¬† <<Click to see an article from commonsensemedia.org about the role of media in our kid’s lives and what their suggestions on preventing this from being detrimental to their development. In my opinion some of their ideas are a little extreme but what are your thoughts on the article?

Agree or disagree?

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We Can’t Make the Bed, You’re Taking Me To the Ball

For those of you who haven’t watched Matthew Clark re-enact real life conversations he has with his two year old daughter, Coco, where have you been? Joining the list of Youtube stars, Clark along with David Milchard (another grown man who portrays the two year old Coco) are hysterical. Day to day tasks such as fighting with your toddler over wearing pants, might not be as funny if you weren’t watching a scruffy 40 something man playing the anti-trouser, Barbie playing little girl. Here’s a gem from Season Two of Convos With My Two-Year-Old.

Butterfly In The Wind

Nobody wants to argue in front of their kids.

Those couples that don’t have a problem with intense disagreements, violence in the home or financial and personal issues, don’t think it should ever happen and go further to say, if you allow it to happen you are endangering your child’s mental health.

Those couples are right. However, like I said, nobody wants to argue in front of their kids. Nobody wants to make any mistakes at all. But they happen and they happen often. Will you argue in front of your kids at some point no matter what the situation? 99% of the population, yes you in fact will. It then becomes a question of when does it start to affect your child.

I can tell you from everything I’ve researched and read, that this “danger zone” will happen before you notice a difference in your child. It will be slow and gradual. And once it hits that point, it will be extremely difficult to repair.

For all those eternal newlyweds that don’t have any consistent bickering, you will say to those who do, “just stop it” “break up” or even, “why do you need to argue?” Not so easy my friends. The only thing you can really do is watch your child’s¬†face and when they look at you with fear or anger, you turn around, put on your parent hat and say, “I don’t matter right now.” Let¬†your spouse¬†win the fight, lie, give in, walk away. Allow yourself to take the brunt of everything¬†to save your child any pain. From small fights over the meaningless to violent knock down¬†wars, your child is innocent until the day they¬†aren’t and our job as parents is to preserve that innocence¬†for as long as humanly possible. To¬†teach them kindness and cooperation.

Far too many people in the world today struggle because their parents didn’t put them first when they were children. And they saw and heard things they shouldn’t have.

‚ÄúChildren are gifts. They are not ours for the breaking. They are ours for the making.‚ÄĚ
‚Äē¬†¬†¬†¬† Dan Pearce,¬†¬†Single Dad Laughing

Fairy wings and race car dreams for the children. Not a nightmare real or imaginary should they know.

http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2013/04/29/179237081/shhh-the-kids-can-hear-you-arguing-even-when-theyre-asleep

The More I Know, The Less I Understand

If the truth of the matter is the only one you can trust are your children, does that create an unfair expectation? Is that too much pressure on them?

It does if you use your children to heal yourself. If you use them to fill your voids. If you use them to provide love you are missing.

Children are not made to take care of you. Remember it is the other way around. You child can never feel your desperation or your need because children are naturally prone to provide comfort and caring, it’s in their innocence.

Part of the sacrifice you make for your children is you must always pretend to be strong, whole and sane. Even when you’re not.